Top 5 reasons that I can not win a top 5 blogging competition!

I just flipped over to my main man’s blog (www.stupidtom.com) and saw that he has entered this competition and found much humor in his post.  In it, he has motivated me to action.  I have only been blogging now for a month and a half now, and I am as close to being addicted as it gets.  So, on that note, I thought I would compete for the sake of getting my toes wet in this whole “blogging competition thingy”.  Do I expect to win?  Shizer no!  But, I will probably learn a thing or two while I explore why blogging is fun in the first place and why I suck compared to so many who do this with a serious purpose. 

5. As I mentioned, I am new to this and I haven’t even uncovered the tip of the iceberg when it comes to my blogging ability.  It’s kind of like a Star Wars jedi thing.  I am nothing but a young Aniken who is busy working on robots for my slave owner until I become noticed and led to learn the secrets of the Blogging Jedi Masters.  Then I will turn evil and move to a very dark theme for my blog page like many others. 

4. My blogs have no purpose.  I just like to ramble on like a homeless man who is on a 9 month bender.  This morning I contemplated blogging on the fact that my wife and I now buy bottled water because we are too lazy to fill our water bottles by the slow pouring nozzle on our frigerator.  Without a purpose, readers only gain the knowledge of how ridiculously retarded my life is. 

3. I think I read somewhere on the rules for this competition that entries written by crazy balloon twisters (www.misterd.balloonhq.com)  with Mad Cow disease would not be accepted… (http://dennismitchell.wordpress.com/tag/blood/)

2. Good things do not happen to good people.  I have come to this realization in life.  You have to be old and live on a farm or work for a manufacturing plant and drive a Harley to win the lotto.  (or just play) Which, those two classes of people describe the majority of those who do spend money on the lottery.  I am sure some evil, wicked, man who has just finished pushing an old lady to the floor after calling her fat will win this goofy thing. 

1.  One of the comments was to “Feel free to put your post in your own first language.”  Which to me,  pretty much announces truly how stupid I am.  If someone who speaks multiple languages is entering, I am pretty sure they possess way more knowlege about many things, much less blogging.  Once I read that suggestion, the theme of my entry was clearly obvious.  If only I would have paid attention during the 4 years of spanish during high school I would have a much better chance of winning.  “como esta?”  “muy bien”  “Y tu”  “tu papa vive en la casa de caca?”  Sorry, but that is as far as my secondary languages go.  I’m pretty much screwed…